2 Samuel 13 (See our study of 2 Samuel 11,The Consequences of Sin [study to come], and David’s Family Tree)
David’s dysfunctional family is portrayed in this gruesome tale of Amnon, Tamar, and Absalom. The actions taken and not taken in this chapter will haunt David for the remainder of his life. The crux of the story is this, David’s children, from various wives, fall in lust with each other. The son and daughter of a foreign princess (Maachah the Geshurite) were Tamar, a virgin, and Absalom. They were good looking, which led to both their downfalls. Amnon, David’s oldest son by a foreign wife (Ahinoam the Jezreelite), fell in lust with her. He deceived her into sleeping with him, he raped her, and then pushed her away in disgust. According to Levitical law, he could not marry her even if he desired to (Leviticus 18.11). Her brother wants their father, David, to discipline his oldest child, which he does not. Absalom becomes quite angry and plots to kill Amnon. He is successful. The heir to the throne is murdered. Let’s see what parallels this has with David’s sin with Bathsheba. David slept with a woman that he should not have slept with and she was in a time of purification. David committed deception and murder to correct a sin. David is reflected in the lives of these sons of his. No wonder he didn’t want to discipline Amnon nor Absalom. Absalom is lost too. He flees to his mother’s area of the world and lives in Geshur, which is a refuge for criminals. David did not mourn the loss of his dead son, much like he did not mourn the loss of his dead son in 2 Samuel 12 (see our study). Instead, he mourned the loss of his living son, which runs parallel to 2 Samuel 12 as well.
A generality follows:
This is a warning to all women, beware the flattery and seduction of men whose sole desire is to have sex with you. The treatment that Amnon gave Tamar should not be considered abnormal. It is normal. When a man is in lust with a woman and is unwilling to go through the formalities of marriage, his sole desire is the sexual experience, and not the person.
How you treat women reflects your character. How you discipline your children will determine their future. Think on these matters.
David did not discipline his children. He ignored their sins and did not choose to correct them of their wrong. This chapter could be a reflection of Proverbs 22:6. David did not train his children well and this was a factor that led them to committ the sins they did.